Monday, you sucked.
So, Jesus left me more stuff today - a cross and a pamphlet. The cross was totally awesome, but the pamphlet turned out to be Jehovah Witness literature ...
I have JW PTSD. Remember how they used to stalk me?
Then, later in the afternoon, I somehow ripped a major hole in my pants.
Yeah, seriously. It couldn't have been like a little hole, it had to be a massive ass crater. WTF.
I don't know exactly how or where the hole happened, but I'm almost positive a 3 year old demon child is the one who caused it. I noticed the huge tear AFTER I saw him. I should have known something bad was going to happen, because as soon as I saw him he ran up and hugged me and then told me he was actually a monster robot and began clawing me and my pants. So, I blame him. The demon child-monster robot-pants clawing 3 year old did this. I just know it.
***********Tuesday, please don't suck. Thanks.