Sunday, November 8, 2009

Bikers (APAD)

The 49th picture in "A Picture A Day" series.

Bikers bother me. Not all of them, just a select few. I guess I don't understand why bikers feel the need to ride in the middle of the road. Go to a freakin' trail!! To me, riding your bike that only goes like 3 miles per hour on a roadway meant for fast-moving vehicles, is a total safety hazard.

I almost killed the guy, aka "The Douche," pictured above. And, no it's not because I took his picture while driving, it's because he decided to ride his bike in the middle of a curvey road. I drove around a curve and had to slam on my brakes because there's The Douche happily pedaling away. Then, instead of realizing what an idiot he is for almost getting himself killed and moving to the side so traffic could go around him, he continues pedaling in the middle of the lane. Lucky me. So along we move ... The Douche: pedaling so fast his legs look like they might break off and, yet, only moving at a turtle's past. Me: thinking thoughts of death and destruction and trying not to slam my foot against the gas. The guy in the car behind me took out his anger by revving his engine and laying his hand on the horn and not letting up. I loved it!

Eventually we ran into two of his biker friends. Yay! I had three biker-douches/douche-bikers to deal with! Luckily it was only for a short period of time until, for some odd reason, they moved to the side of the road. This is when I captured a picture of The Douche.

To all the bikers out there, please enlighten me on some things: Why do you ride your bikes in traffic lanes? Why do you choose to bike on roads that have blind curves and could get you or someone else killed? Do the seats hurt your butt after awhile? Does it squish your testicles? Does biking exercise anything beside your legs? What, in particular, do you enjoy about biking?

Thank you for your time.

1 comment:

Tiffany said...

You would LOVE Critical Mass in San Francisco. (note the sarcasm in the word love) Google it. :)