Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Lady in the Pink Bathrobe

There is a lady in a pink bathrobe that wanders around Chauncey. Though, I haven't seen her in almost 3 months, so it's quite possible that she's now wearing clothes and I just don't recognize her. Who knows? My last sighting of her was near an intersection by our local gas station. Pink bathrobe lady was picking up trash along the road!

The first time I ever saw the pink bathrobe lady was shortly after we moved in. One evening, me, Mason, Stephanie, and Ryan were hanging out on the back porch talking, when all of a sudden we heard this dog (which is located kinda kittycorner behind our house) start growling and barking like crazy. It sounded like the noises a dog would make before, during, and after an attack on someone or something. Then we hear this little boy start screaming. Well, it was just one consistently long scream ... "AAAAHHHHH, AAAAHHHHHH, AAAAAHHHHHH, AAAAAHHHHH, AAAAAAAHHHHHH, AAAAAAAAHHHHH." And we see him holding his shoe while running back to his house. just a couple houses down from my own. Well, we all lost it. It had to be the funniest thing I have ever seen and heard. Oh, I know, I know. How sad! This little boy got attacked by a dog and lost his shoe. Boohoo. Well, this dog is on a chain, mind you, so the only way this kid could have lost his shoe from the dog is because he was messing with him. In my opinion, the stupid kid got what was coming to him. I'll come back to this poor dog on a chain in another post, because he gets messed with a lot. No wonder he is so mean!

Anyway, the screaming kid runs into his house and the next thing you know we see a manwoman with a mullet come out of the house and start powerwalking over to the house with the dog on a chain. I call this person a manwoman because I really am not sure if it was a man or a woman. It was just really skinny, with a mullet. I'm guessing it was one of the parents to this kid. So, of course, some of us are encouraging the manwoman with phrases like, "Yeah, go get some," and others (me and Stephanie) are in support of the dog on the chain so we are just like "WTF manwoman! Your kid shouldn't have been messin' with the dog on the chain!!!"

After the manwoman goes marching over to talk to the owner of the dog on a chain, we start to see all the neighbors coming out of their houses to take a peek at the drama unfolding. One of those neighbors, was the pink bathrobe lady. She was walking up and down the street smoking a cigarette. I bet it was one of those really long cigarettes too. What are they called? Viriginia Slims, maybe? At first we all thought, that the pink bathrobe lady must have been in such a hurry to find out what was going on that she couldn't put clothes on first. Apparently, not, however, since I have seen her multiple times since then in her pink bathrobe.

I wish I could tell you what ended up happening with the owner of the dog on a chain and the manwoman with a mullet, but I have no idea. I do know that a Sheriff ended up coming to deal with the situation, but the specifics of how it all ended, no clue.

And, so ends the story of the lady in the pink bathrobe.

Until next time, my friends.

1 comment:

Tiffany said...

Was it Albert? That kid needs to have his shoe taken by a chained up dog.